Quit Worrying and Just Grow

Today’s rant: a preponderance in society, and especially in social media, to make gardening seem like constant landscape perfection. For starters, nurseries, botanical gardens or garden bloggers tend to avoid posting photos of diseased, dead or poorly performing plants. At times, we even enhance our photos with widely available filters.

peach on tree
Perfect peach? Sure, but what the photo fails to reveal is this is the only, and I mean only, peach the tree produced.

But that’s pretty normal, right? Consumers are more confident in nurseries with healthy plants. But some photos on social media are enhanced beyond reality, and the constant barrage of perfect plants, fruit and flowers can make millennials and other new or hesitant gardeners believe their gardens must look as rich, lush and perfect as the examples flooding their smartphones.

To exacerbate the problem, popular posts in my social media feeds often have headlines that read like this:

“10 Mistakes Every New Gardener Makes”

“Growing Tomatoes – You’re Doing It All Wrong”

“Top 5 Garden Failures”

Although some posts and authors have great intentions, other sites write headlines primarily for click-throughs. I try not to save or read these, but prefer instead to get my information from positive, researched posts and publications. Nearly everyone who gardens encourages others to try it; that’s especially true of those of us who write about gardening.

suyo long cucumbers
Some people turn up their noses at these burpless Suyo long cucumbers. But they’re delicious!

But how encouraged can new gardeners be by messages of failure? Believe me, we all experience problems and pitfalls in gardening, no matter what magazines and social media portray. Here are a few ways to overcome concerns about having the perfect looking garden, largest and prettiest fruit, and other pressures:

Learn by trial and error. This is the ultimate in “on-the-job training.” Although it’s frustrating to realize you’ve wasted some time and money on a plant that dies, you learn from your mistakes. Start small on gardening in general and with any new plant or project. If things go wrong, it’s an easier pill to swallow! At any rate, lower your expectations just enough that you do the best you can, but recognize that’s all you can do.

tomato plant problems
I showed this sad looking roma tomato plant a few weeks ago. It’s producing mature fruit, but we’ve learned it’s probably not the best variety for us to grow.

Gather information, but don’t overload yourself. There’s so much out there on gardening and DIY projects that it’s easy to get confused and overwhelmed. Use plant tags and local, credible sources. For example, master gardeners train on topics like general plant and soil health, but also learn about plants specific to their town or region. Books, magazines and websites from your part of the country likely offer the most appropriate advice. There is a definite “East Coast bias” in print and online publishing, and it seems particularly clear in gardening. Those of us in the West and Southwest sometimes have to try a little harder to find pertinent help.

weeds in southwest orchar
Got weeds? We sure do, and we always will.

Grow plants you love. Select plants that make you smile but are native to or hardy in your area. The combination really helps. For example, I love orchids, but have trouble maintaining them in a house that averages way below 30 percent humidity. I know I can, but I’m not sure how much time I’m still willing to give them. On the other hand, I’ve found plants I love simply by walking or driving by them. Some were already in place in the landscapes of new homes. If you love the scent and taste of basil, grow some. And if you choose to work with a garden consultant or landscape designer to plan your lawn and garden, get enough information during the process to select colors, scents, textures and edibles that will bring you the most pleasure.

southwest landscape
Birds or nature placed this sunflower right next to our lavender. If sunflowers pop up so easily on their own in these conditions, why not grow them?

Learn from fellow gardeners. The trial and error aspects of gardening apply to all of us, and often family or neighbors have great advice because they’ve tried something that did or didn’t work. If you know that your mother or best friend had a bounty of delicious snap peas last year, ask for some help getting yours started. Master gardener training and expert advice provide great information, but I’ve learned plenty from friends and family, especially when I’m trying something I’ve never grown before.

Don’t give up. Like I said in a post earlier this month, it’s so tempting to quit when weather, insects and weeds wreak havoc on your best-laid plans. But keep plugging along, recognizing that you’ll have to put up with some weeds or limited flower or fruit production.

The quest for perfection is exacerbated in other areas of life, not just gardening. We want to look like photoshopped models, prepare meals that belong on the cover of gourmet cooking magazines and plan the perfect party or wedding. The truth is, real life involves moderation, imperfection and learning from mistakes.

So just get out there and garden. Plant a new bush in your landscape this fall or buy a succulent to adorn your desk this winter. And enjoy the process along with the results.